Good things about dementia

1. Fart in public, nobody says shit.

Worse names for Apple's new tablet than iPad

1. iSanitarynapkin
2. iTampon
3. iMenses
4. i.
5. iAmbleedingbloatedandcrampingandwhatthefuckareyoulookingatasshole
6. iForonewelcomeournewcomputingoverlords

Reasons why this recruiting class means Texas will play for a title in two years

1. Upgrade along the D-line. Best class of defensive linemen in the Mack Brown era, for sure. DEs of both the quick end and power end variety. DTs of the Lamarr Houston and the Roy Miller variety. Look for at least three of these guys to crack the two-deep by the end of the year.

2. Upgrade at linebacker. The loss of Norton hurt Texas this year as it forced Muckelroy to play middle LB with only E. Acho and K. Robinson on the strong and weak side spots. The two deep had Acho and Robinson backing up each other with Earnest backing up Muckelroy--4 players covering 6 spots. With Norton and Earnest back next year the MLB spot is covered, but look for Tariq Allen to make a move backing up Keenan Robinson and one of Hicks, Benson, and Tevin Jackson to back up Emmanuel Acho. Of the 3 Tevin Jackson may have the most potential as MLB someday. In the recent past Texas has tried to cross-train their LBs anyway, so it's not a huge distinction.

3. Upgrade at WR, assuming this group has more Quan Cosby-s (Cosbies?) and fewer Phillip Paynes and George Walkers. Mike Davis and Darius White are likely to get in the rotation immediately, pushing guys like Chiles and Kirkendoll. Eventually Chris Jones might be the best of the group. Harris is gravy and Terrell will have to put on weight to play TE (hopefully more Jermichael Finley and less Dan Buckner).

4. The OL from 2009's class should be matured in two years with the two from this class providing quality depth. The line from this past year was the worst in the last five years and they still got to the title game.

5. Kept the best athlete in Oklahoma out of OU's hands. Who knows where he plays, but it doesn't really matter.

Don't call it a comeback

Mama Said Knock You Out - LL C...

I'm going to open this back up. New format is going to be a series of lists, posted every Wednesday, punctuated by the odd rambling post about college football, music, or my career. Hopefully it will be as fun as the previous format. Even without the defaced Peanuts strips. Ideally some commentors will be moved to leave their own lists on the theme of the week.

Bovine Spongiform Revengcephalopathy

I know where they research the madness of cows
Misshapen proteins
Misshaping the brains
I know who deserves the resulting sponge holes
Yellow car driving
Yellow heart beating
I know how to mix prions with Mickey D's
Savory toxin
Savoring the sin
I know when pores make mind flow retardedly
Delayed my revenge
But it would be fucking sweet.

Haiku revenge

a car so yellow
matched perfectly to your soul
how does my ass taste?

Revenge by Jessiiiiiieeee

I'd make you have sex with Jessie
on her period, extra messy.
Her cats would watch with shock and awe,
strap-on stuffing your exit maw.
The look in her eye is not meek,
how 'bout the tear upon your cheek?
How 'bout the pit inside your soul
as she runs off pinching your pole,
without explanation or note
she's gone with a flick of your scrote.