are there any openings on the lunatic fringe?

Really a companion piece to last week's post.  This is another personal favorite from the second worst-night of my life.  Read more here if you didn't previously.

suddenly I've lost all my enthusiasm

A personal favorite of mine, I've told the story here.

the Sam Snead of music!

I wish I had been present for this one. Snake and my dad were out at the site of my uncle's new house. They were helping out with some landscaping or construction or something. I think there was a family function like Thanksgiving or a big football game or something that night, so my Dad wanted to hurry up and get done. My aunt, whom my Dad never seemed to care for all that much, kept whining about some nonsense or other, delaying the departure to whatever my dad wanted to get to.
When they finally get to leave, my dad pantomimes a conversation with my aunt for Snake. He gets one of his patented "utter disgust" faces and begins, staring into an empty area as if she were there. "I just wanted to say to her, 'You listen here, you silly little bitch.'" This is the one I imaging my wife says about me most often when I'm not around.

It's like trying to forget the H-bomb!

Apparently there's an undertaker in my hometown who doesn't like my dad. I know this because my dad expressly said "If I die, don't take me to him. He might try to cut my dick off or something." As he said it he made a slicing motion with his hand. The fact that he was not kidding in the slightest made it all the funnier. Someone else will have to remember how this came up in conversation.

This post got bumped up the order after Snake brought it up in the comments last week.